this and that

back to basics

2010-07-03T19:52:00.001-07:00

so where have i been bloggers?

struggling. thats where; struggling.

so i've been thinking a lot lately about how to handle life and this is what i've come up with

back to basics

#1 simplify

pizza

= cheese + sauce (tomatoes) + bread

= dairy + grain + vegetable

= <3

why treat it as something else? the only power fear foods have is what you give it.

i'm not gonna be afraid of an italian specialty ever again..

#2 do indulge

never ever turn down a scoop of ice cream ... not only did it cause me to miss out on a fun time with the girls but it only triggered mmm... about 30 scoops of ice cream later on.

moderation is key, my friends.

#3 love yourself

probably the hardest one to comprehend, but anything made in God's image, is perfect. YOU are beautiful in His eyes. Lovelovelove.

#4 trust others

my nutritionist obviously isnt gonna make me fat? so yes, miss dietician, i will try your meal plan (:

#5 no excuses

nothing in life should compromise your health. i never again will let a b/p pass as an nbd (no big deal)

so much to catch up on!

later loves

reaaaaaaallyy?

2010-04-23T11:29:00.000-07:00

have i honestly neglected my blog again?

... i did, i'm sorry.

this has been my life in one sentence.

sleep, eat, school, eat, work, eat, sleep, work, work, work, work.

get it?

semesters almost over so i definitely will find sometime!

cannot wait to move to VA BEACH FOR BIBLE COLLEGE!

yayayayy sand!

i'll leave ya to think about this!

when God takes something from your grasp, He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better..

strangerr

2010-03-29T00:35:00.000-07:00

uh huh, that would be me..
not because i havent wanted to, but because i havent had a chance to even breathe!
i'm basically living at Friendly's, employee of the month? (;
hehe so no pictures, no exciting news, just another month here and gone!

hopefully april brings around some interesting moments that i can blog about,
plus some yummy foods :D

Virginia beach, my ladies

devoted womens conference 2010

2010-03-05T09:38:00.000-08:00

in Virginia beach!
blog back soon :D

life as an adult

2010-03-02T18:41:00.000-08:00

to tell you the truth, i dont feel older! i was hoping my eighteenth birthday would be magical. i'd wake up and FEEL like an adult, but nope i'm still my goofy self..

and that would be my sissy..

growing up is more of a... mm process?

i guess i was responsible like an adult and did my classwork allllll day! (wrote fifteen page essay HOLLA)

dined like a responsible adult with a well balanced lunch:

butternut squash soup with parmesan, laughing cow, whole wheat flatbread

THAT WAS THE BEST CANNED SOUP EVER! thank you target for that amazing birthday present in a jar..

and went to work like a responsible ADULT employee (:

after a long shift i came home with some great tips and an awesome surprise:

BALLOONS BIGGER THAN MY BODY!

yeeee so maybe not all boys are jerks!

... maybe

to be continued!

woo 18

2010-03-01T08:40:00.001-08:00

18 years of age today. craaaaazzzzyyyyyyyy

you know what that means?!

VISA! muahahaha

i feel like this was yesterday...

back later with a big post!

never

2010-02-27T10:25:00.000-08:00

if only, i could see what it would be like if i never suffered from anorexia.

how different life would have been!

i would have never lost my love for dance...

i would have never have lost my passionate future of living in the city

i would have never have lost my first true love...

i would have never have lost my group of friends...

(to a degree, i never wanted to do anything!)

to become someone i never imagined i'd be:

Recovery is more than weight gain, youre gaining your life back..

your hope, your future, your passion, you

NEDA- spread awareness, gain back a life

silly advertisements

2010-02-24T04:33:00.000-08:00

before my spin class, i stopped for a late lunch at whole foods;

garlic green beans, sesame glazed tofu (my favorite), stir fry noodles, and a quinoa dish.

I HATED THE QUINOA and i dont know why?! maybe because it was cold? i didnt like the mix with chickpeas? hmmmm... any good recipes i can try at home?

its okay; i finished everything else (;

ohh and i love what the little tent fold says in the background:

"be good to your whole body"

yet another silly advertisement!

Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. -C.S. Lewis

that man is pure genius.

hungry? grab a snickers.

2010-02-21T22:09:00.000-08:00

honestly i HATE snicker bars, idk why? maybe its because im not a huge fan of chocolate..

but moving onnnn. i saw a commercial for it today and here was there hook;

"you aren't yourself when you're hungry"

woah! well hello deeper meaning!

snickers actually had a point here, i began thinking of how far i've come since being wrapped up in anorexia; gosh i really wasnt myself! i was a lifeless, depressed frame of a once energetic beautiful girl. ( i wish i could find this commercial; it was funny; google you disappoint me)

i convinced myself that i wasnt starving, desperately hungry, when in reality that was so far from the truth. gahhh i NEEDED to eat about 100 snickers (;

its funny when you find motivation in silly advertisements, but i'm glad i just happened to flip to this channel today!

overwhelmed

2010-02-20T10:48:00.000-08:00

by the mass amount of junk food my great aunt bought us:

mind you; theres only 3 girls living in my house (:

so you bet my weaknesses made it into that cart!

Chips Ahoy! and ice creammmmm

yeeeeeeeee

whats your favorite junk food?

remember moderation is key (;

i forgot

2010-02-14T11:38:00.000-08:00

i forgot that despite the fact that i'm super girly, i love freaking camping!

haha i think its just the atmosphere of getting away from the real world

p.s. i love all that unhealthy camp food too,

so bad, yet so good (;

childhood nostalgia: fluffernutter

in a bowl, duh :D

lets see? skiing is dangerous! what the heck, i feel like i got ran over by a bus, buttttt i was pretty good!

... on the bunny hill

ex? not so good, lets not go there

friends? amazing! love god, love life, love health

You are altogether beautiful, my darling,
beautiful in every way.

songs of solomon 4:7

breakkk

2010-02-11T05:16:00.000-08:00

yup, i havent been here in idk 4593830 days?

oh welllll...

wish me luck for i am going on a youth retreat in the poconos this weekend (more snow; gag me).

anxiety is at all time highs for this trip:

catered meals (usually i'm ok with them but this is all junk food! we have the menus)
never been skiing/snowboarding/tubing (brilliant time to try right)
3 days in the same location as my ex, who happens to be the pastor's son (we were serious for 2 years and uhm now he doesnt acknowledge me) i am STILL not over it..

wish me luck, i have a feeling i'm gonna need it!

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

isaiah 41:9-11

unwrapped

2010-02-05T10:47:00.001-08:00

literally this wrap was coming undone as i was trying to snap a picture!

turkey club wrappish:

Flat-Out STUFFED with smart balance mayo, turkey, uncured all-natural turkey bacon (35 cals, 6 g protein for a huge thick slice; DOESNT taste like bacon but it definitely DOESNT taste bad! better actually), romaine, carrots, and tomato with a gala apple. i hate to take a bite! :D

please try this? and tell me this isnt one of the best combos God ever created (; hehehe

plans for the rest of the day?

gym to run! gotta be consistent!

work? friendlys? right. because people want ice cream during a blizzard !

whats your favorite sandwich? this is definitely top 3 on my list!

yeeeeeee

2010-02-05T05:40:00.000-08:00

winner of the wimpy giveaway is miss becca!

please send me your address lover and i'll send them out asap!

there might be a few surprises, but if i told you then it wouldnt be a surprise. duhhh

be back later with some YUMMY eats from today

weeeeeeeeeee (;

happy friday everyone

veggied out

2010-02-04T08:01:00.000-08:00

EARLY (LIKE 2AM) why cant i sleep?!

i woke up oddly enough craving vegetables;

plain, boiled, crisp vegetables.

what the heck?! is my body trying to tell me something?!

exactly what i had: 2 eggs scrambled, huge bowl of steamed broccoli, carrots, cauliflower, served with a ~~bottle~~ squirt of ketchup

other eats i've been meaning to share:

yesterdays lunch:

roast beef, provolone, and spinach panini with a golden delicious

some snack?

vanilla oikos with a whole grain banana nut muffin, little spoonful of barney butter just for good measure :D

yummmmmy

i've been running everyday and its true! it does get easier! for all you treaders out there, any suggestions on getting more miles in?

how do you fall asleep? AND stay asleep?!

i'm blonde (r)

2010-02-03T15:47:00.001-08:00

my hair was yet again dyed and the fried feeling was back!

HAIR TIP : for smoother hair, while in the shower, conditioner still in, use a wide toothed comb to brush through before rinsing! really does work! (;

don't forget to enter the giveaway below! sample organic hair products are now included:D pictures to follow!
also, one more surprise will be added tomorrow! (;

ohh i'm excited! hah yayayyayay

giveaway

2010-01-31T11:13:00.001-08:00

i'm newish to the blog and i dont have many readers (obviously haha) but i still want to do giveaways! i love them and i'd love to share my favorites with you..small and simple but here it is.

my absolute favorite tea. you cant beat it (: i'm more of a coffee drinker but this stuff is amazing.

the website describes it as a fruity black tea with hints of lemony bergamont.

idontknow its indescribable to me.

all you have to do is leave a comment telling me your favorite morning pick me up

or add me to your blog roll and let me know!

i'll give it til friday since i dont know how many people will enter and will draw a random winner then..

not much, but i'd enjoy it (;

foods for thought

2010-01-31T06:29:00.000-08:00

take care of your body, take care of your hair with the foods you eat!

according to WebMD, these are the top ten foods for a gorgeous head of hair

salmon

dark greens such a spinach

beans

eggs

poultry

nuts

oysters (ew)

low fat dairy

carrots

wholegrains

seems easy to follow right? your hair is mostly made of keratin, a protein also found in nails, so obviously i recommend getting enough protein! how can you grow a protein if you arent eating enough of it to replace the source? you can find lipids in you hair too, when i started eating nut butters, i noticed a HUGE difference. my hair is very course, not so soft, but when i added nuts to my diet during recovery, i noticed that my hair is significantly smoother and who wouldnt want that? (;

oh and dont just worry about your locks! your hair starts at the scalp.

healthy scalp = healthy hair!

get enough b-6 and sulfur

you can find them in:

cabbage

fish

onions

cucumbers

sweet potatoes

wheat germ

the list goes on!

try avoiding a lot of fried foods, but i think thats pretty obvious (:

try these suggestions out and see if you can tell a difference!

CIAJ

2010-01-30T05:31:00.000-08:00

i broke the mold this morning and made this:

(whole foods cashew butter is almost better than my jiff.. almost)

i made cereal in a jar. I poured a cup of Trader Joe's Soy and Flax Clusters into the almost empty jar and filled it with milk. i let it soak in a little and the results were glorious!

haha it was so fun scraping a little of the butter off with each bite!

and unlike oats, its nice and cold and crisp

(i'm definitely not hating on the oats though!)

Soy and Flax Clusters are my favorite cereal although they are pretty calorically dense

per cup:

190 calories

3 grams fat

7 grams fiber

9 grams protein

BUT CHECK OUT THE STATS!

i'm thinking of adding hair products and styling to the blog, what do ya think? god blessed me with a good head of hair and i love taking care of it! it is the only thing that anorexia didnt steal from me (when i was sick) and thats pretty surprising.

i did it..

2010-01-28T18:55:00.001-08:00

i took a picture of the usual

mind you its not that great looking!

whipped banana bran with pb

EVERYDAY!

i wake up every morning (almost every) and make this bowl of energy. thats all food is right? a source of energy that without we wouldnt be able to function! i go into my kitchen and make a mess, i boil 1/2 cup water with 1/2 cup milk (or soy whichever) and eventually add 1/4 cup oat bran. i then slice a HUGE banana real thin and whisk it into the mixture. i let it simmer a little longer (depending on how hungry i am!) and then add a splenda and some vanilla extract! pour it into a bowl and add as much peanut butter as you want.

CAUTION: peanut butter will be the death of me

i happened to eat it out of a large glass cup this morning and put a spoonful of pb in first. itwas a nice little treat for the last savory bite! (:

big day tomorrow! school 9-12, work 12-8, training at other job 8-12. oh boy; this is gonna be nuts! (; i'm planning on eating a lot of them too!

oops...

2010-01-27T18:46:00.000-08:00

so i definitely didnt wake up in time for abnormal psych today! my b! ):

its crazy how your body can adjust, its time for me to change my alarm, it no longer does its job!

after accepting the fact that it wasnt worth it to even be tardy, i had my usual breakfast!

(still too early for a photo but i will try tomorrow!)

and started cooking for URBAN PROMISE

i made a simple tray of ziti and stuffed shells

we then take it up to a school in Camden where we serve it to underprivileged kids and hang out with them for the night(;

if you live near Philly, South Jersey, and you'd like to get involved, Let me know!

as for my eats today, not photoworthy. but i'm gonna start taking pictures for my own accountability!

i did have one of these on my way FROM zumba TO yoga

(crazzzzzy i know!)

wawa all natural milkshake! so freaking good, so worth it!

ingredients: strawberry ice cream, milk

tonight i took my first HOT vinyasa flow tonight and i loved it! i guess when youre in a room thats a 100 degrees, you loosen up a little bit (;

any indulgences you'd like to share?

no wayyyyy

2010-01-26T13:50:00.001-08:00

i woke up early for class today and started my day off with yogoat

thats what i like to call it!

i soaked a packet of truly vanilla GOLEAN hot cereal in a chobani greek vanilla yog with 1/2 cup water, what i like about these packets is the whole flax seeds mixed in. when left over night they plump up and are yummy and chewy!

in the morning i topped it with CBU and fresh shredded coconut.

wait, CBU? oh right let me explain.. remember the invention of PBU on the blogosphere a while back? i didnt have my own blog back then but i was still an avid reader.

i made CBU

1 part cashew butter
2 parts vanilla soy milk

mmm! makes the perfect frosting! its creamier, sweeter, and spreadable. TRY IT with any nut butter!

i also tried some kale chips today! SHUT UP, i did not believe Gumdrops when she told me they tasted exactly like tortilla chips.... well they do:

lined a sheet with parchment paper, layed out the kale, drizzled with olive oil, and sea salt and baked for ten minutes at 375.

i was impressed.

(i'm so impatient the short cook time was a definite plus as well!)

any interesting foodie recipes you'd care to share? loveee to hear some! and try of course (;

ilovegumdrops

2010-01-24T11:57:00.000-08:00

today was SO much better already.. thanks for all the support lovies (:

woke up to my usual (cant get enough)

banana oat bran with peanut butter

its too early to ever get a good enough photo

and went straight to church, if you havent met Jesus Christ, he's a pretty cool man (;

i then ventured to the gym with my long lost best friend

i will refer to her as gumdrop for the sake of identity (;

after more flirting with the guidos than actual fitness,

we hit up SALADWORKS for a yummy lunch:

created my own after a salad i had in philly:

mixed lettuce, carrots,red onion, turkey, BACON (oh why did i deny you for so long?), feta and mushrooms all tied together with FF Balsamic

the hot toasty whole wheat rolls are freaking unbelievable

we went back to her house and tried kim kardashian's butt blaster, we burned more calories laughing than you would even if you put effort into it(;

i then ventured off to friendly's where i did bust some butt serving sundaes and burgers :D

came home to a lovely snack plate:

carrot chips, pumpernickel rye whole grain pretzels, cucmber slices

all deliciously dipped in cottage cheese/ salsa

a lot better than it sounds! brilliannnnnt combination :D promise.

no good.

2010-01-23T19:22:00.001-08:00

today was no good. i did something i havent done in a long time and idk what triggered it?

gahhh i binged/ purged. what the heck? i thought that was all in the past..

i had a fine day, i was not stressed, my calorie intake was high enough, i wasnt anxious over anything.

JEEZ I WASNT EVEN BORED!

it must have been because no one was home and i could get away with it..

easily.

mehh no good no good no good):

hope everyone else's day was better

the other white meat

2010-01-22T12:18:00.000-08:00

guys.. i have to confess something. i'm a meat lover. yupp cant deny it! when i was "sick" i was a vegetarian for all the wrong reasons. Meat in moderation has plenty of benefits and gahhh, i honestly cant get enough(; so wrong i knowwww..

take for example this easy dish i made:

i know my photos suck, i'm working on it:P

apple slow roasted pork:

pork loin rubbed with salt and pepper and roasted in an apple spice glaze.

UNBELIEVABLE! if you want the recipe i'm more than happy to share! :D

why choose pork?

Pork contains significant amounts of Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Thiamin, Niacin, Riboflavin and Pantothenic Acid.

packed with iron (; ladiessssss

pork loin is in fact leaner than chicken thighs and

it provides plenty of protein for muscle mass and some fat to keep your skin healthy.

nutritional powerhouse i'd say (:

procrastination at its best..

2010-01-21T13:20:00.000-08:00

the fact that im taking 6 classes this semester (why) means my time on these sites is going to have to be limited ): but i cant help how fun they are! thought i'd share them with you since my foods been pretty lame today and not blogworthy...

lumosity.com brain games?! claims it can make you a more productive student(;

sporcle.com CAUTION its freaking addicting.

pilatesanytime.com awesome online classes with a free two week introduction:D yogas more of my thing though

yogatoday.com free weekly class and challenging flows LOVE IT

uo blog just love the fact that every monday is Music Monday with free song downloads from bands that i adore

thought i'd share with you how great of a procrastinator i have become

off to Pilates Core Plus, wish me luck!

what websites are you mindlessly addicted to? (mm facebook)

FRIENDLY FACES

2010-01-20T09:56:00.000-08:00

unlike yesterday, today has been awesome

i made it to my 8 am class and lurvveedddd it!

abnormal psych talk about interesting!

theres a lot about eating disorders thats going to be discussed so we'll see how that goes (;

but i'm also really excited that we have to visit 2 institutions of our choice to really experience firsthand the effect of mental disorders. oh where to choose? :D

before i went, i had a simple breakfast. cant tell you the last time i had cold cereal...

kashi island vanilla wheats with raspberries and 2% milk

little thick for my taste

and i definitely missed my oats

yummmm nonetheless

i had another date with Amy for lunch.

this time we had pizza, (spinach!) (on sale at WF!) with a side of grapes

i truly am in love with this woman (;

not only is it "healthy" for a pizza, again it is probably the best frozen i've ever had!

the key is to lay it directly on the rack (and hope the cheese doesnt get toooo melty)

oh oh ohh! i start my new job tonight, at friendlys! no more italian market. serving kids alll night sounds great, right? and no that isnt sarcasm!

today is not my day

2010-01-19T14:39:00.000-08:00

blahh is the only word to describe how i feel..

MISSED MY FIRST CLASS ON THE FIRST DAY BACK,

way to go taylor, good FIRST impression.

off to zumba to lighten my mood(: nothing works better than a little butt shaking rightt? right.

facing fears in NYC

2010-01-18T06:09:00.000-08:00

like i said in my previous post, i've been up there multiple times the last few weeks. excited to live there soon!
but when i mention fears, i'm not talking crowds, strangers, bars, subway, and all that stuff i'm talking this:

S'MACS is to die for! (no literally if you ate this everyday you honestly could from clogged arteries) it is amazing but scared me! wow pasta and cheese? hi anorexia, i've missed you!

but that doesnt mean i want you back (;

i ordered the Veggie Lite- whole wheat pasta, light cheddar, parmesan, broccoli, cauliflower and garlic! I couldnt get over how good it was! also had a side salad. (picture from a non-food blogger HA) i ate every last bite.

hehehehehe (;

fear of the unknown was not gonna stop me! can't wait for the future!

who else is excited to see the HUGE plans God has in store?

amazing.

looooovelara

2010-01-17T09:22:00.000-08:00

since i fell off the face of the planet for a little, i wasnt able to share the package i got from LARABAR!
they had a five day giveaway where everyone was able to win <33
follow them on twitter @LARABAR

four full size laras of their best sellers,
pb&J,coconut cream pie, key lime and one more i cant remember?

they didnt last long (;
wow i have so much catching up to do!

took the longest break!

2010-01-16T18:56:00.000-08:00

mehhh! sorry guys! i will start tomorrow! my resolution for the year is to be consistent in all areas of my life(; blog included!

been so busy spending time in NYC. going there for college next yearrrr! (if all goes to plan!)

representttinggggg

lets change this up a bit..

2009-12-24T21:11:00.000-08:00

and preach it a little. God's been working in me a lot lately about letting go and moving forward with all aspects of my life. I'm restless and cannot stop thinking about my past and suddenly it dawned on me, its OVER. I cannot change it, i cannot relive it, i cannot let it stop me from experiencing life.. my circumstances do not define me..

with each season of our lives, there is something to learn. no matter how rough it may be or productive it is, God is trying to show us something. without problems, there would be no need for miracles.
i used to constantly question God on why i have to deal with ED? why me? why can food, meant to be enjoyable, completely control my life in a negative way? i REGRET dieting and stepping on the scale for the first time, but i shouldnt. everything happens for a reason, and God doesnt put mountains in your way that you cant move! wow, i started thinking of all the people i've met because of this and i found my passion to help others who struggle too! God works in us to glorify is kingdom in the strangest of ways. and nothing is too big for Him! God fills that void in your heart that nothing else will ever be able to. "once you've gotten yourself filled up at God's table, you won't be hungry for anything else." amen.

wow i know this post is kinda random and all over the place, not my best of work but a lot has been running through my mind..
i dont care if you comment this or not..

MERRRRY CHRISTMAS!
but the best present ever, God gives us everyday
Timothy 1:7
for God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of sound mind..

night loves.

quick post

2009-12-22T11:00:00.000-08:00

wow, the difference running shoes make!

haha and all this time i just thought i wasn't cut to be a runner (;

i recently bought a pair of new shoes and today i decided to hit da mill

and guess what!

i beasted 2 and a half miles!

now that might not seem like a lot to you, but this is coming from a girl who could barely run a lap around the track :D

mighty fineee i must sayy.

off to work! and then i'll be with this lil' one:

her first Christmas with my crazy fammm; ahh SANTA WHO?!

i want my own...

:D

2009-12-19T12:13:00.000-08:00

sorry for the lack of posts! i gotta work on being a better bloggerrr. eh oh well.

amy once again is genius...

instant gratificationnnn<333

i tried AMY'S VEGETABLE LASAGNA today for lunch and oh my! how does she do it??!?

it was amazing, the sauce was actually yummy! (usually the frozen entrees are yuck!) and the pasta cooked beautifully. they could have been more generous with the cheese though! (no worries, i fixed that!) but then again its only 310 calories!

12 grams fat

4.5 sat

35 g carb

5 g fiber

16 g protein

not too shabby for a ridiculously large portion of lasagnaaaaa!

anyone else snowed in like me?!

healthy enough..

2009-12-13T20:19:00.000-08:00

TO DANCE AGAIN! MUAHAHAHA

woke up and made HOMEMADE MAPLE AND BROWN SUGAR OATS

betta than da instant stuff

sooo good. so so goood.

make it please

1/4 oats 1/4 bran 1/2 vanilla soy 1/4 water 2 splenda maple extract vanilla

ZAP IN DA MIKE

top with brown sugaaaa and mm smart balance

AND ZAP AGAIN!

:D oh my oh my

i legit wore my tights to church today

i was that excited

(iwishitookapicture!)

i packed a little fuel

my wawa, 2 BABY apples (SO TINY SO CUTE), a serving of pistachios, and a powerade zero. GENIUS

my nutritionist has taught me well

i am so sore already. woah wait til tomorrow!

sugar high

2009-12-12T17:22:00.001-08:00

my plan kinda backfired; I am currently babysitting the most energetic kids ever... my fault.

I thought maybe making a gingerbread tree would keep them occupied for a while, nope they just ate the icing and now are bouncing off the wall

look at that finished product! :D

its snowing

2009-12-05T14:03:00.001-08:00

and i had to drive home in itt! EHHHH!

ha well i came home to our xmas tree up. its very traditional.

terribly bad photo, i take them on my iPhone. i'm lazy with my camera.

but you get the idea (;

we have 9 full size tree. we kinda love xmas.

i made this for a linner (lunch/dinner) when i cam home from work:

i like to take the foods from the market and make them healthyyy.

grilled chicken, grilled asparagus (yum!), red onion, plum tomato on a bed of romaine.

i used Marzetti's all natural light balsamic vinegarette and enjoyed a side of KASHI crackers.

i dont think i liked them. i LOVE garlic, but not the amount on these crackers! i'm gonna be reeking for days.

night in, decorating another tree :D

so funnnnn !

panera who?

2009-12-02T14:40:00.000-08:00

wednesdays honestly are blah, except for ZUMBA but that was cancelled...

blahhhhh

i work all day

it was so slowwwww; i was able to sit down and enjoy lunch..

MMMMMMMM!

anthony had made an awesome butternut squash puree. i had two bowls (!) and a side of whole grain crackers. not my favorite; sorry.

this kept me full allllll day. i wish i could go back and relive that meal (;

but uh dinner was just as good...

there's a turkey artichoke panini at Panera Bread that is to die for. unfortunately, i did not feel like driving forty minutes for a sammy. i made my own. JUST AS

GOOD!

no, ACTUALLY BETTER.

roasted turkey breast from the market, handful of spinach, some mozzarella

but it was nothing without the spread

canola mayo plus spinach dip mix!

omgooodness

ingredients in the dip:

spinach flakes
onion
garlic
dill

Proverbs 3:9

honor god with everything you own.

give him the first and the best.

allow me to introduce myself..

2009-11-30T19:47:00.000-08:00

i used to dance 6 days a week since i was two..

loved being the center of attentionn..

i was Miss NJ when i was five. i was legit (:

i always strived to be better.. stronger... smarter.. funner.. (more fun ha) and thinner..

my self confidence plummeted.

i know jealous guys (;

this is the last picture i would let myself be in.. i hated who i had become and was ashamed of how i looked. and to think, i thought i was ten times bigger than her. my XX lbs was not even close to what i needed to be for my 5'6 frame..

I GOT HELP

i still struggle everyday against my ED, my anorexia turned bulimia. but i am learning to love myself for how God created me.. He created me in His PERFECT image, who am i to change that?!

if it wasnt for my faith, my family and my nutritionist i wouldnt be where i am today..

i am starting to actually enjoy food again.

the more i post the more youll hear of my story..

but uh i thought this might help a little (;

night loves

the two ugliest photos in the worrlllddd

2009-11-30T15:17:00.000-08:00

ohh...

yup that would be me.. with the beautiful nerdle glasses to match THAT beautiful face...

NOT :D

and a beautiful bowl of oats..

NOT!

but it did taste great! i eat the sameeee thing every morning; i'm addicted. but when i woke up we had NO bananas! and NO jiffy! what the...

i had to compromise so in went:

1/4 cup oat meal
1/4 cup oat bran
1/2 vanilla soy milk
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup raisins
vanilla extract, maple extract, splenda, and cinnamon

OMGOSH!

it was a verrrrry close second to the best breakfast ever..

the picture is so ugggg though! /:

my bad, must have been too anxious to dig innnn (;

love me some carbs

better than v8?

2009-11-21T16:27:00.000-08:00

of course! i hate v8! :X

went to the KOP mall today with my girls and was able to quickly snap a couple of pictures of our yummy mid-afternoon pickmeups:

i got the body cleanser (obvi you cant read that sign)

in it was apple, carrot, tomato, grapefruit, cucumber, and watermelonnnnn

it was sooo hard to walk and snap a photo with an iPhone with shopping bags full of goodies while trying to do it nonchalantly (; i dont think i succeeded very well..

THANKSGIVING AND THANKSLIVING EVERYDAY :D

muy, muy bien

2009-11-17T02:18:00.000-08:00

hola amigas! me gusto mucho mexican! QUESO! wow so annoying.. but my eats were all in some type related yesterday..

came home starvinggg (HUNGER CUE SO EXCITED) and made this..

amy's natural cheddar burrito! she's genius...

along side some grapes the size of golf balls (i kid you not)

and i topped it with this! :

think outside the bun (;

something about taco bell hot sauce just makes everything seem more... mmm tastier!

and then dinner came and again i visited mexico.. HUGE SALAD

low fat beef (!), corn, peppers, cucumbers, salsa, taco bell (; tomatoes and onions.

oh and tried yogurt ranch dressing? alllll good.

mejor comida nunca!

keeennn- waaaaa?!

2009-11-15T18:24:00.000-08:00

while the rest of my family indulged in greasy fries, i brought this little guy from whole foods with me for the gathering (: usually i'd be all for the cheesesteaks and onion rings buttttt the way i've been eating lately; kinda turned me off.

WHOLE FOOD BURRITO with quinoa (KEEN WAAA?!), and grilled veggies. I think there was carrots, green beans, squash, some other goodies? didnt save the wrapper /: all i know its my favorite everrr.

what are you thinking? your words speak life or death? are you discouraging or encouraging? are you building a mountain in your life or moving it? mmm i'm hoping to be more positiveee :D

godsent

2009-11-14T19:27:00.000-08:00

trader joes is straight from heaven i swear..

its pretty self explanatory (;

i just love the fact that the only ingredients listed are: organic skim milk, organic honey

yuppp and like i said earlier things have been hectic. ive been fighting b/p and it isnt working ): what the heckkk? with my anorexic control gone, my ravenous bulimic urges develop? not cooooolll. my hunger cues havent came back yet and i dont get full!

i could eat and eat and eat.. its actually quite impressive :D i'm at a healthy weight and i think that is what scares me! whats enough to maintain?! i am not so sure..

tomorrow is a new day though! its Sunday, CHURCH mm loves

awkward introduction.

2009-11-13T05:29:00.001-08:00

dont mind me. ive been up long enough only to eat my oats :D

my fuel

2009-11-12T16:02:00.000-08:00

i feel like i've been driving all day... and really i have; i went to the gas station twicee.

nice knowing ya tips! :P

if it wasn't for my WAWA i think i would have died waiting in that traffic...

coffee kept me happpppy (;

for those unfortunate enough not to have a wawa, i'm really sorry :/ its the ultimate convenient store. BEST HOAGIES I SWEAR and can be healthy :D not to mention theres one every two miles... literally

in my 20 0z...

organic peruvian blend <3

splash of skim milk

splash of wawa's amazing french vanilla creamer

mmmmm amazingggg

thats my car btw

meet Dick the Civic !

body issues lately? yes. opened to this passage? wow.

those who think they can do it on their own end up obsessed with measuring their own moral muscle but never get around to exercising it in real life (!). Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open, into the spacious, free life. Focusing on the self is the opposite of focusing on God.

-Romans 8:5-8

love fall

2009-11-09T19:33:00.000-08:00

love seasons 52 grill!

all entrees under 475 calories and menu changes with the season!

omgosh..

turkey burger with mozzarella cheese and portabella mushroom!

side salad was my favorite though!

WOW so impressed with this tea!

unsweetened natural passionfruit green tea..

can i buy these in bulk?

THANKS :D

wowww

2009-11-08T01:34:00.000-08:00

sorry for the lack of posts!

and heres anotheer dud.

my dog just ate another jar of my peanut butter

sweeeeeeeeeeeeeet

2009-11-04T20:54:00.000-08:00

i-heart.org

skyr.is?

2009-11-01T09:57:00.000-08:00

new yogurt i found at whole foods (:

came with its own plastic shovel so i couldnt resist (;

vanilla flavoredddd yumminess and honestly you couldnt beat the nutritionals;

naturally fat free
17 grams of protein (!)
150 calories

considering it came with a shovel, i thought for sure it would be suppperrrr thick. but nahhh, consistency was perfect not to mention the actual vanilla bean in it ! :D

added some pumpkin seeds and a little GO LEAN

paired with a honey crisp apple

and you got the perfect lil' snack!

must get more!

kid-friendly

2009-10-30T19:09:00.000-07:00

lately i've really been craving my childhood favorites! you cant go wrong with basics! of course i upped the nutrition (:

annie's organic mac and cheese! microwaveable added some spinachh

comeeeee onnn

low sodium tomato soup and grilled ham and cheese! (2%singles of course)

please try it! use some butter flavored pam and thats it!

more cheese please?!??

yummmmmm

no wonder i loved being a kid

what kept me going...

2009-10-27T19:48:00.000-07:00

an hour on the elliptical and my buns are thanking mee :D

couldnt have done it without good old DISNEY, this amazing memoir AMEN AMEN AMEN, and those hunks lifting weights down there (;

but seriously get yourselves a copy of that book! omgosh sooooo amazinggg! Abby Sher shares her story about overcoming anorexia and obsessive compulsive disorder. i cant put it down! even though its such a serious subject, abby is able to find humor through all of her sufferings. This is an awesome inspiration; anyone can overcome their struggles. freaking buy it :D

thats all.

helpppppp!

2009-10-27T11:30:00.000-07:00

these last few days have been a blur, nothing but oats and chips ahoy! cookies; i kid you not.

finally went grocery shopping and got some new items..

this is where i need your help.

thats right; i've never cooked my own!

recipes? any meal? i dont careee!

i'm up for anythinggggggg

thanks babes!

...

2009-10-24T16:51:00.000-07:00

i've binged/purged.

never done that before...

highlight of my day

2009-10-22T19:53:00.001-07:00

SPONTANEOUS TRIP TO WHOLE FOODS!

treated muh self to this lovely combo...

sesame marinated tofu (:, garlic green beans (FAVORITE EVER), some quinoa with zucchini, carrots and peas(awesome grainnn; get ittttt), whats your favorite grain?and some seaweed salad..

the seaweed salad was not what i expected, its nothing like the seaweed in miso soup ? still amazing; I ate this cold before shopping around for some fun foodie products; this would have probably tasted great warmed up too (;

i wish i had a credit card that you never had to pay backk.. that'd be great. Got some awesome clothing at URBAN OUTFITTERS todayyy. unfortunately too many and now i'm running low on currency.

Let's hope for some good tippage tomorrow at workk.

vegetarians be advised..

2009-10-21T17:34:00.000-07:00

i spent the entire time at work wrapping these;

ewwwwww; they call that meat?! yuck yuck yuckkkk

anyways, this week is just full of left overs; cant waste delicious food!

i've had some fun snacks thoughh including

POPCORN

my friend had a movie night and she made this for us!

aweeee so sweet;

popped in olive oil and sprinkled with garlic powder, parmesan, and sea salt.

surprisingly healthy

did you know that popcorn is whole grain? It contains antioxidants, fiber, and b vitamins (;

and you can have about 3 cups for 100 calories... VOLUME ladies... love it

i'm off to do some more psych! seeeeeee ya

real fast.

2009-10-19T22:01:00.000-07:00

where did all my self control go?

I NEED TO STOP EATING CUPCAKES

dumb leftovers :D

live

2009-10-18T14:26:00.000-07:00

continuing from my previous post sometimes you need to give in to your temptations; i said i'd be eating lighter today which i have compared to yesterday (; but you know what? i ate LEFT OVERS and they were delicious. I WANTED A MEATBALL PARM SANDWICH SO I HAD ONE! on a white roll may i add..

life is too short to not allow yourself certain foods, avoiding places because they dont have healthy options or not trying that amazing cake your grandma made because you know its not WHOLE WHEAT..

i eat healthy most of the time; i enjoy eating healthy but c'mon; are you really saying you will never indulge in a greasy grilled cheese once ever again? your body will take care of youu.. having some of these treats once in a while will not KILL YOU or even worse make you gain weight but it will SATISFY you and thats the important point i'm trying to make here..

i had a meatball parm sandwich and for dessert, TWO cupcakes. i do not have one ounce of guilt on my shoulders

they were delicious.. my nutritionist comes tomorrow and she will be proud (:

i had a "normal person meal" and guess what? it wasnt so bad after all...

my philosophy

2009-10-17T20:11:00.000-07:00

flowers from my daddyyyy aweeeeeee

EAT WHAT YOU WANT AND AS MUCH AS YOU WANT at your own party (:

why worry about calories and fat? when you could be having

funnn; i admit my tummy ache right now hurts a little /: but was so worth it! my friends and family all came to celebrate my early graduationnn and it couldnt have been any better

my house turned into a buffet;

all the goods, pasta, chicken, egg plant parm, MEATBALLS (gasp)

fresh grilled veggies

i thank Aunt Mary for this beautiful HUGE bowl;

probably about 10 lbs of blackberries, pineapple, raspberries, strawberries, and grapes

TDF uhhh

and my cupcake tiers :D

church tomorrow, possibly some ballet in philly and more church later on...

I will DEFINITELY be eating lighter tomorrow but DEFINITELY NOT restricting

my body will tell me when its full (;

We were all created in God's Image, God's PERFECT image, love what He has blessed you with

preparation

2009-10-16T19:30:00.000-07:00

a restless night? idkk if it had to do with the movie? nahh totally kidding i had wayy too much CAFFEINE yesterday.. by the time i fell asleep i didnt want to get up so i ended up sleeping through both my classes :O yikes; oh well

i got to wake up to a delicious bowl of this:

pumpkin oat bran

real original i know, but seriouslllyyy it is so goooooood

1/3 cup oat bran, pumpkin, milk

some vanilla, pumpkin spice, SPLENDA :D

1/2 banana

and topped with FF whipped cream (; some almonds and granola

i spent the rest of the day preparing for my graduation party, my mom likes to go a little over board with everything. wait till you see the food tomorrow!

at work tonight i tried something new...

"just green tea" not so much..

even with splenda it was hard to gulp down

see ya tomorrow!

peaaaaceeeee

debbie downer..

2009-10-15T19:46:00.000-07:00

mmm.. no pictures this post, and not to burst any bubbles but i was thoroughly disappointed with "paranormal activity". gahhh what was supposed to be the scariest movie of the year was a dud..

idk maybe its just because ive seen so many scary movies; they all blend together but i was looking forward to a good scare like this :O and i got :/ ickkk.

better food for better people...

2009-10-14T18:43:00.000-07:00

I work at an Italian Market;

I'm a server/deli/cashier/ dishwasher..

but my main goal is to sell this:

large hunks of cheese dont really appeal to me (:

I also get to wear this pretty shirt :

ya heard right..

dont get me wrong, i love my job, but nights like tonight i just didnt want to be there. cut my finger again ): stupid cheese

fun fact; according to Freud, i apparently am sarcastic because i didnt bite enough as a baby. Well, i'll just make it up now (; with some good eats

addiction.

2009-10-11T20:11:00.000-07:00

i'm taylor and i'm addicted to ice cream.

its badddddd; i need help (;

nomnomnom

ohohoh ohhhh

dont forget to;

trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding

i'll figure this out..

2009-10-06T18:49:00.000-07:00

can i tell you how i woke up at 1:50 AM fully alert? gahhhhh. I ate breakfast, did laundry, abs, caught up on homework just to pass time and then it was still only 5 AM?! whattt theee...

i have a sleeping problem; i just know it.

the rest of the day was a blur, i blame sleep deprivation.

I'll start posting food pictures, verses, the goods when i understand how to work this blog (:

my life can be fun sometimes :D

hi (:

2009-10-05T18:21:00.000-07:00

wow so excited to finally blog!

cant wait to get startedddd; hopefully it isnt too confusing!

love to meet any of you bloggers!

nightttt!